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About Jay Hekate

I consider sex coaching to be work of repairing bridges – between spirit and body, sex and everyday life, our intelligence and our wildness. In our work together, it is my sincere hope to guide you on your journey with love and curiosity, shining light into the darkness and helping to open doors that may have closed long ago.

I originally hail from Vancouver (hence the Canadian extra “u’s” in words like “honour”) and now call Seattle home. In my downtime you will often find me dancing in the rain, cuddling with friends, going on strange adventures, riding my motorcycle or singing songs in devotion to nature and Mystery.

Founded in 2011, my coaching practice continues to grow and change, helping individuals, couples and groups develop a direct, authentic and often life-changing relationship with their sexual selves. I draw on influences ranging from earth-based spirituality to tantra to co-counseling to somatic therapy and neuropsychology. Like all things in nature, humans are diverse and no two of us respond the same way to the same things. I prefer to tailor my sessions to your needs rather than try and fit you into some conveniently general theory.

My gratitude to the many people who have shaped my practice and philosophy along the way: Dawn Isidora, Ravyn Stanfield, Teri Ciacchi, Robyn Lynn, Alex Jade, David Cates, Allena Gabosch, Jim Duvall, Dr. Liam “Captain” Snowdon, Nekole Shapiro, Kristen Rawson, Dr. Betty Martin and many others. I consider myself lucky to have access to such a kind, generous and supremely skilled community of people.

I am also grateful for the pioneering work of Pat Califia, Joseph Kramer, Annie Sprinkle, Jack Morin, Carol Queen, Betty Dodson, Staci Haines, David Schnarch, Barbara Carrellas, Kerstin Uvnas Moberg, Starhawk, Kate Bornstein and countless others. Thank you all for your courage and brilliance.

Related Education and Training

  • Sex Educator Training with SFSI (2014)
  • Urban Tantra® Professional Training Program with Barbara Carrellas (2013)
  • Priestess Apprenticeship in Experiential Leadership with Ravyn Stanfield, Dawn Isidora and Suzanne Sterling (2012-2013)
  • Celebrating the Body Erotic with the Body Electric School (2011-12)
  • Conscious Sensuality with Robyn Lynn and Robert Silber (2011)
  • Erotic Coaching series with Dr. Betty Martin, Sex Educator (2011, 2013)
  • Reclaiming Tradition Teacher and Priestess (2006-Present)
  • Aphrodite Temple Training and Facilitation with Rev. Teri Ciacchi (2007-11)
  • Clitoral Revelations with Rev. Teri Ciacchi (2006, 2009)
  • Seattle LoveTribe Training and Facilitation (2009-10)
  • More Oxytocin Please! with Nekole Shapiro (2010)
  • Pelvic Floor Healing with Amara Karuna (2010)
  • Sacred Sex Magic series with Ravyn Stanfield and Dawn Isidora (2010)
  • Holistic Peer Counseling Training and Assistant Teaching with Kristen Rawson (2010)
  • Genderfluid Tantra with Alex Jade and Reid Bruggemann (2009)
  • Learning and Acquisition Method Facilitation Training (2001)
  • Bachelor of Arts Degree in Religious Studies (2001)